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A Rapper Went To A ‘Magic’ Tournament And Took Pictures Of Every Exposed Butt
If you like big butts and you cannot jank, then head to the nearest Magic: the Gathering convention, where it’s one giant derrière party, emphasis on “giant.” An Action Bronson-looking rapper who goes...
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You Need To Hear This 911 Call From A Family That Was Attacked By Their Cat
WBTV This sentence belongs on the Mount Rushmore of journalism ledes. A fat cat with a bad attitude attacked a baby and forced a Portland family to hide in a bedroom before calling 911. (Via) I’m...
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UPROXX @ SXSW: Pulp’s Jarvis Cocker Talks To Us About Getting Sweaty
It’s impossible to feel cool when you’re standing next to Jarvis Cocker. You’re always going to be at least the second most hip person in the room, third if Pulp’s bassist Steve Mackey is there, too....
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A Former Late-Night Show Host Has A Sex Tape (And A Very Big Penis)
Getty Image Never let it be said the world doesn’t know how Dave Chappelle would respond to “news” that Johnny Carson not only has a sex tape, but also a big penis. (“Name something The Tonight Show...
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America Loves ScarJo: 8 Things We Learned About Who The World Is Masturbating To
This may come as a surprise, but apparently people on the Internet really want to see Scarlett Johansson naked. Next you’ll tell me message board commenters want to be the FIRST to something. But it’s...
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Looking For A Fun, SXSW-y Time? The Woven House & UPROXX Night Have You Covered.
If you’re in Austin, Texas, for South by Southwest this week and looking for a place where everybody knows your name, head to the Woven House (and when you arrive, tell everyone your name). From...
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Olivia Wilde Will Rock And/Or Roll In Martin Scorsese’s Sex-Fueled HBO Drama
Getty Image Martin Scorsese’s untitled rock ‘n’ roll drama for HBO is the Traveling Wilburys of TV shows we haven’t seen. The series has an all-star lineup: written by Scorsese (he’s the George...
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Reminder: The Official UPROXX SXSW Showcase At The Woven House Is Tonight
We mentioned it yesterday, but we’re bringing it up again, because we’re THAT excited. Tonight at the Woven House, and with support from Jägermeister; Spike TV’s Ink Master, Frankenfood (be sure to...
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Hear Iggy Pop And New Order Cover Joy Division’s ‘Love Will Tear Us Apart’
Does New Order playing a Joy Division song count as a cover? I’ve never been sure about that. Let’s spend the next 15 minutes thinking about the meaning of the word “cover,” and music...
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The New Jersey Cheerleader Who Sued Her Parents Is Returning Home
FACEBOOK Rachel Canning is homeward bound, and bound to never mention that whole “suing your parents” THING. Rachel Canning, the Morris County teenager who sued her parents to force them to pay her...
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UPROXX Exclusive: Hear The Newest Mixtape From The Melker Project, ‘Red Hot...
After breaking the internet a few months ago with Ballin’ Oates, the Melker Project has released his newest project. On Red Hot Trilli Peppers, the Melker Project has deconstructed each and every...
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Lindsay Lohan Keeps A List Of All The Famous People She’s Hooked Up With
Getty Image Lindsay Lohan’s a bit like Richard Nixon, in that she’s dedicated list-maker. Except instead of writing down her enemies, which everyone who suffered through Liz & Dick would be on,...
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Attention Ladies: There’s A Gross Subreddit That’s Stealing Your ‘Sexy’...
Stock Photo via Getty Ladies, be careful what you put on Facebook: you never know where your pictures will end up, and the number of perverts who will do terrible things to them. Reddit can be a very...
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Can You Name The Super-Famous Porn Star Who Secretly Appeared In The ‘True...
During the much-analyzed (there’s a bad pun in there that’ll make sense later) opening credits for True Detective, a mysterious, dark-haired topless woman appears on screen for all of three seconds....
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Greatest Newspaper Correction Ever Apologizes For Hinting At Apocalyptic Man...
TWITTER THEY were right along: the Can-Eaters vs. Human War is coming. If only we had listened to the Argus. Don’t apologize. You done good, not baaaaaaaaaaaaaad. Oh god, it’s happening already… Via...
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This Photo Of Lady Gaga Wearing An Iron Maiden Shirt Pretty Much Sums Up SXSW
INSTAGRAM Last night in Austin, the following pop stars were all on the same street (where I once stepped into pizza vomit) at the same time: Justin Bieber, Kanye West, Method Man, Redman, 2 Chainz,...
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Two People Are Dead, Dozens More Injured After A SXSW Hit-And-Run
Terrible news from Austin, where two people are dead and 23 more were injured after a car went down a crowded one-way street early Thursday morning, plowing over barricades, bicycles, and tragically,...
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Guess Which State Cut Out The Only Reference To Evolution In ‘Cosmos’
While you’re still trying to wrap your mind around, like, the complexities of this beautiful bitch of an existence we call life, MAN, thanks to Cosmos, be glad that don’t you live in Oklahoma City...
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Live That Fantasy Of Black Simon & Garfunkel Covering ‘Royals’
It’s been awhile since we’ve heard from Black Simon & Garfunkel, but on last night’s Tonight Show with Jimmy Fallon, the turtlenecked-duo took a page out of Bruce Springsteen’s book and covered...
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The ‘Jeopardy!’ Supervillain Finally Lost Last Night (And Recorded This Weird...
ABC R.I.P. Arthur Chu (on Jeopardy!). The most hated man in the game show’s long history finally lost last night, after annoying Alex Trebek and America, minus us nerdy nerds on the Internet who...
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